WHAT TO DO AFTER A BREAK-UP

A break-up is almost always stressful. A great deal depends on how much you had invested into the relationship, how badly it collapsed and your direction post break-up. This article is to be used as a little guide to get you through the break up process. At the end of a relationship you won’t always have the clearest of judgement when dealing with the issues that face you.

So you are at the point where your relationship has just ended. This isn’t a rough patch, she has left you, you left her, she was cheating on you etc.

  1. Restrict communication and exposure 

Do not contact her post break up unless it is to work out break up logistics such as shared finances and furniture. Do not text, write, phone or message her it’s over and there is no point lingering around. Once the post break-up details have been worked out, delete her number and remove her off your social media profiles completely. Any communication will likely be used against you or will slow your progress down with moving on.

2. Protect yourself 

  • Protect your finances, you may need to seek legal help to make sure she doesn’t have any access to your money post breakup. This may include changing your will, changing bank accounts, passwords etc. Ensure all monetary matters are sorted ASAP, at the latest two weeks after the break-up. Make sure she won’t come back 6 months later and lay claim to part of your share portfolio, savings or any other assets.
  • Protect your security , You might think she isn’t crazy but some women loose the plot after a break-up. Don’t be that guy that gets caught out. If your Ex has ever shown any red flags of vindictive behavior then you fall in this category. You may have to change locks and anything else that she had access to.

3. limit destructive escapism’s 

You should always avoid destructive escapism’s in general. Hitting the bottle after a break-up helps no one, least of all yourself. It can lead you further down the path of suffering and draw out the pain. You need to except that it will take you a little while to get over the relationship. It may take one man two days and another man 2 months. If you can channel your energies into something productive then good on you. Destructive escapism’s always cloud your judgement and this is why I recommend deleting the Ex’s number as you may ring her at 2 AM after a big night out to call her a “cunt”. While she may be one, that call will be used against you.

4. There’s plenty (PLENTY) more fish in the sea

There is no ‘ONE’, that is a Disney fallacy. If you feel like a loser and that no-one else would ever be with you then go onto point 5, you badly need to take stock and re-orientate yourself. One of the best ways to get over any relationship is to date and sleep with other women. I am not advocating that you jump straight into another committed relationship! My point is that you should casually date other women (multiple at the same time if you can juggle it) as this will destroy any scarcity mentality you may have. Dating other women will show you that your Ex was nothing special in the slightest. You will have a lot of fun, you will work out what you really want from woman and this will in turn cause you to except nothing less than the new realistic standards you have now adopted.

5. work on yourself 

In this life you can never stop working on yourself. You should be your own mental point of origin. Now your time isn’t taken up by your Ex, you can now use that time to make more money, to read more books, to catch up with friends and family. Depending on how comfortable you became how or how out of shape physically you are now at this point it’s time to take stock of yourself and where you are in life. Use this as an opportunity to redefine or re-orientate yourself.

I hope this has been helpful, feel free to Email us if you have further questions.

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